Bedtime for Bonzo.

Tonight as I closed my books and shut off my desk lamp I said aloud to myself "It's bedtime for Bonzo!"  Immediately my mind shot back to bedtime rituals of old.  This was my mom's affectionate way of telling me it was time for bed when I was young.  I am sure it was met with a series of moans and groans from me, but truly, being tucked in was one of my favorite pastimes with mom.

• Sometimes it was a bedtime story.  Usually a Canadian classic such as "Make way for ducklings" or "Love you forever" (which is incredibly pertinent for me now - read it).  
• Then it was a lullaby.  My favorite was "Here comes the sandman," though she had several.  
• Then came my favorite - the multiple mini-kisses on my face.  Each day we would add another kiss until we would forget how many we had gotten to (I think one time we made it all the way to 2 months), and we would start all over again.  They were tiny little kisses that tickled and made me laugh.  
• Finally it was time to be rolled up in my blanket.  She would shove her hands on either sides of my blankets until I was wrapped in a blanket cocoon.  While she did this she would say, "snug as a bug in a rug!"  
• As she left my bedroom she would switch off my light and turn on the multicolored Christmas lights around my door.  My nightlight.  

I feel all of these sensations as if they were yesterday.  I miss being tucked in by mom.  I wonder sometimes if I miss it more because I know she won't ever do it again.

Now I tuck her in.  I brush her hair aside and give her mini kisses all over her forehead.  She giggles.  I sing her lullabies and tell her I love her to the sky and back.  

I guess that this is the normal progression of growing older.  Roles change, we adapt and find new ways to gain fulfillment.  I just think sometimes, on nights like tonight, I long to be tucked in like the old days.